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Making Smart Friendship Choices – Advice from a Middle School Student

November 15, 2011

by Evelyn (6th Grade – Fallon Middle School)

It’s ok to be alone. Think about it hard. Would you rather be sitting home alone or out with a group of “friends” who may not be doing the right thing? You can decide what you think after I tell you what it means to me. Making friends is easy, but the hard part is making the right friends. What do I mean when I say the right friend? A good friend is someone you can be honest with. For example, you and your friend are walking home from school together. Your friend says, “What did you do to your hair? Did you even brush it?” You respond with, “Hey, I didn’t really like that, I didn’t find it funny or nice.” Real friends should have the liberty to stand up to each other without getting angry.

Now, the making choices part. This section is probably the most difficult thing you will have to deal with in friendship. Bad choices, good choices, choices are everywhere! Making choices means choosing a friend that does not make you participate in something that makes you feel uncomfortable. Also, making sure that your friend is not only just nice to you, but to everyone. This means that your friend treats everyone with respect. If not, they may turn on you one day. Imagine, for example, that you have a really nice friend who you love to hang out with. The problem is that she isn’t nice to everyone. The scary thing is thinking that she may turn on you eventually. So, that is when you must make a choice, even if it means giving up a friend.

I realize it isn’t easy to say no, but it is very important. However, you don’t always have to say no. Sometimes you can try suggesting something else to do. For example, your group of friends want to go to a party. It is 9:00 pm and your parents would never let you go to a party, especially this late. You don’t have to leave yet! Try another place you guys could all go to. Maybe suggest a movie or a safe activity. If your friends say no, then what I believe, it is ok to go home.

What I am trying to say is that don’t just make choices in a blink of an eye. Listen to your conscience, think about it, and then decide. So, did you think of an answer to my question: would you rather be home alone or with a group of “friends” that many not be doing the right thing? The choice is yours, but make the right one.

Note from the editor: My daughter wrote this article for a school assignment and she agreed to share her perspective on

  1. 4fairness permalink
    November 15, 2011 9:12 am

    Thank you Evelyn for sharing your assignment with us – It’s a great article and I applause you for not only considering your choices in your decisions but also foreseeing the consequences, especially at your age. It will be much more fun every year to be with true friends, who share your values, and enjoy the successful results of your actions.

    You sound like a very conscientious and insightful young lady. Congratulations to your parents as well.


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